My baby-bottom face is a blessing in disguise given the yuck in beards

My stubble is so unruly that it grows in spurts all over my cheeks and chin, resembling an unmaintained soccer pitch somewhere in the bundus.

I find it easier just to shave it off although I have noticed that EFF spokesperson Mbuyiseni Ndlozi is hailed as a people's bae for sporting the same unkempt facial hair. I felt vindicated at keeping my face baby-bottom neat when I read a recent study that discovered that men's beards carry more germs than dog fur.

Some ladies have compared kissing a bearded man to kissing a goat, and please don't interrogate me on how they would know the similarity.

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